My Story - the conclusion

When I got off of work that night he was waiting outside for me, It was September 16 1995. Looking at him made butterflies in my stomach like I had never had. He asked me to go for a drive with him and I accepted. We drove around for about 2 hours talking about everything from our goals in life to the strange man walking down the sidewalk. He made me feel like a different person when I was with him… in a good way. Like I could just be me and that was ok. He asked me that night when he dropped me off at my car “Come watch me ride bulls tomorrow in Bruneau.” I thought that sounded exciting and told him I would be there.

The next morning Nicole and I headed to Bruneau to watch him. I was exhilarated and nervous all at the same time. When he came out of the chute on that bull I knew he had me. I love the bad boy dangerous guys and that is definitely something Josh was… but he was also so sweet and good natured. He was the perfect guy in every aspect of the word. That night before we left for home he asked me if I would like to date him exclusively, of course I said yes.

Over the next few months I fell harder and harder for him, which was an issue with my mom because she did not approve of him at all. I am honestly not sure why but the fact was she didn’t so that made it tough. Eventually though she got used to the idea of him and I and got past it. Josh and I became very serious , very fast. But considering the past we had it was not all the surprising. We had already known each other and been friends for so many years. We spent every moment we could together and very quickly I fell head over heels in love with him. He made me feel so different then anyone else had, he was such a good person I felt good being with him.

The summer between my Junior and Senior year was the best summer of my life… to this day. Josh and I were together all the time… cruising town or hanging out with all our friends, watching movies or just sitting in the Frosty Palace parking lot talking for hours. He was so perfect to me. That summer was the first time he said “I love you”.

We started our Senior year together and it was about ¾ of the way through our Senior year that Josh told me he knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me and asked me to marry him when we got out of HS. I said yes right away… I knew I did not want to live the rest of my life without Josh and I knew he was the one for me. Just like I knew in 6th grade he was the one for me. I do not believe in soul mates but I believe in true love and I know that is what Josh and I had and still have to this day.

We graduated together in May of 1997. My grandpa was Governor at this point and I really wanted him to marry us. In order for that to happen we would have to get married before his term was up, which was in 1998. But I didn’t want to marry Josh a few months out of high school. I didn’t want to be “that girl”. I wanted us to live our lives in the adult world and make sure that we could do it. And I wanted to go to and finish college, which I knew would be hard to do once we were on our own. So I went to Cosmetology school and finished in October of 1998. Josh and I then moved in together in January of 1999.

It was September of 1999 when we got married. My grandpa was not able to marry us but that was ok… we had such a beautiful wedding. To me it was perfect… everything I had always dreamed of when I was little. We honeymooned in McCall for 3 days and just enjoyed being “us”. We knew we did not want kids right away, I feel bad for couples who get married and have kids within the 1st year. That time with just you and your husband is so important to build a solid foundation of marriage before bringing kids into the picture. Your whole life becomes about your children once you have them and I think you need to have a very solid marriage to withstand that. So many people do that and then get divorced when the kids leave home because they don’t know how to be a married couple without there whole focus being on kids. Josh and I waited 3 years to start having kids and it was the best decision we ever made.

When I look back at the last 20 years of my life with Josh I know if I had it to do over again I wouldn’t change one single moment. I think Josh and I have such a strong marriage and such a deep love for each other because of the many years before we actually became a couple. We have had many ups and downs but I couldn’t imagine my life without him… not for one single moment.

And whatever happened to Matt Freelove… well he and Josh are very good friends and he lives 3 houses down from us with 2 boys of his own and a wonderful girlfriend. Him and I have remained very good friends.

My Story - Part 2

Shortly after arriving at Matt’s party I saw Nicole and Matt dancing… very close among other things. I was devastated… this was my best friend and the “love of my life“ (or so I thought when I was 14)… acting very inappropriately. How could they do that? I reevaluated my friendship and reconnected with Carrie again. As far as I was concerned Matt was out of my life and I was moving on. Of course that lasted for about a month and Matt called me on night and told me to turn on my radio. He had requested “Everything I do, I do it for you” by Bryan Adams and there it was on the radio. How could I say No to that?? On again we were. And to this day I can’t hear that song and not think of him.

It was the summer between my 8th grade and Freshman year that I became friends with Nicole Maupin. Nicole had a cousin… his name was Josh Love. Nicole lived right next to her grandma who happened to be Josh’s grandma as well. As luck would have it Josh was close to his grandma and spent a lot of time there. I pretty much lived at Nicole’s house that summer. Becoming closer and closer to her family which meant closer and closer to Josh’s family. His sister and I actually became friends… although she was 3 years younger then me. I really really came to like this family, but nothing became of Josh and I. I was still “dating” Matt but noticed I thought of Josh more and more each day.

Freshman year started in August and Matt and I were still “on”. Things seemed to be going really well with him. We went to lunch together, talked on the phone every night and spent as much time as we could away from school together. But that month something changed. To this day I cannot put my finger on it but there wasn’t those feelings for him any longer. I had fallen so hard for him over this 3 year span that I couldn’t imagine not being with him but he and I both knew it was time to move on. I was devastated because I knew this one would be permanent, not like all the times before where we would be back together in a week but permanent. And it was…. In October of my Freshman year I said goodbye to him for good and over the next few months I forgot about him more and more with each day.. It was May of my freshman year when Nicole and I headed to the Jordan Valley rodeo and I ran into Josh… we connected that night like I never had with Matt. I knew right then that Josh was good for me. But nothing ever came of Josh and I… we got along great, he was incredibly good looking and a super nice guy but we were just friends. He or I was always “dating” someone else when we would pop up into each others lives.

The months went on and I dated a few other guys but nothing serious. I got my drivers license, had a serious car accident, started my first job and went on with my life seeing Josh here and there in between but never anything more then a hug and a how are you. We once ran into each other at a party briefly and talked for hours, even shared a kiss but that was the extent of it. Josh had a girlfriend at the time who was a good friend of mine so I really never thought much more about him and I ever having any kind of future together.

It was the beginning of my Junior year before I would really notice him again… the same way I noticed him that day my 6th grade year. He was in his dads Chevy pick up when he came to the drive up window of the fast food restaurant where I worked. He had changed so much during the summer before. He had been rodeoing all summer and had been gone traveling across the state so I had not seen him for a few months. When he rolled down his window he took my breath away.. He was so much more then I remembered. He flirted briefly with me and drove away. It was right then and there that I knew my life had changed… that there wasn’t going to be anymore Hi’s and nothing else, that whatever it took we would try out more then a friendship and see where it would take us. He came back in later that evening and asked me what time I got off of work.

My Story - Part 1

I love to remember the story of Josh and I... so I thought it would be fun to put it on here for others to read and for me to have. Josh and I were a long time coming and many many years have gone by since I first noticed him on the playground to where we are today. This is our story... from my view of course.


I was 12 years old when I first moved to Homedale schools from Vallivue schools. It was the 6th grade and I had never been more terrified in my entire life. All the typical thoughts kept running through my head. Will I have any friends? Will anyone like me? What if they all think I am weird? My first day at my new school was both scary and exciting. This was a new chapter in my life and even at the young age of 12 I knew that and knew I had to make the best of it. I horribly missed my best friend from Vallivue, Keri Cloud. She and I had been inseparable for the last 3 years and I had no idea what I was going to do without her by my side.

My teachers name was Mrs. Eidemiller and she did a good job at helping me to feel comfortable in my new atmosphere. I was going from a class of about 200 to a class of about 60... It was strange. Everyone knew everyone and had been together since the Kindergarten, that is the way small towns are. It is very hard to move into a small town and be accepted right away.

Carrie Pearson was the first one to introduce herself and would become my absolute best friend from that moment through our senior year. Right away we became very close, talking a lot about the boys in our class and the teachers in our grade. Several boys introduced themselves to me throughout the day and at last I had made it through my first day of school.

The next day and every day thereafter became pretty much the same… I slowly made new friends and a few boyfriends and each day became easier as I left my old school and life behind me and started a new one. I had been in school for about a month when I really noticed him for the first time. We were at recess and he walked by me and caught my eye. It was then that I asked Carrie “who is that?”. “that is Josh Love” she told me. WOW was all I could think… even in 6th grade he seemed perfect to me.

Days turned into months and I had really settled into my new school and new friends. It was an evening and the phone rang… it was Josh. I don’t know how he got my number or why he was calling but we talked as much as 12 year olds can talk for about 25 minutes. He made me laugh. It was the next day after that I told Carrie… “I really like Josh, someday I am going to marry that boy”. She laughed of course and said “I don’t really see that happening.” “I know” I said “but it is fun to dream.”

Months went by and before I knew it 7th grade was here. Finally I was in Jr. high… I was becoming an adult you know… at least that is what I thought at the time. I had my own locker and I was finally “developing” into my body. I had been in school for a few weeks when Matt Freelove approached me and literally changed the path of my life for the next 3 years. We flirted back and forth for a few weeks before finally he “asked me out”… now if you remember what that is like in 7th grade it means you talk A LOT on the phone and occasionally hold hands at the class assemblies and dance close at the dances, that is about the extent of it. Matt called me one night and said “would you like to go out with me”, “sure” I said. I hadn’t really talked much to Josh in the past few months so I thought well Matt is definitely good enough looking and seems like a nice guy, why not?!

I had no clue how hard I would fall for him over the next few months. I don’t think you can really have your first love when you are 13 but this was as close to that as you could get. We were together off and on for the rest of my 7th grade year. Once the summer came I had become very close to a girl named Nicole Quintana… she had become my Keri Cloud. That summer we were together every day of the week. She lived about 2 miles out of Homedale so we would ride bikes into the local swimming pool and I would meet Matt there everyday. Every day I fell harder and harder for him… everyday we became closer and closer. We would talk on the phone in the evenings for hours and hours on end when we weren’t riding bikes through town or swimming at the pool.

Before I knew it 8th grade was starting… Matt and I were still “a couple” and my life was so perfect I couldn’t have asked for anything more. Although my friendship had remained with Carrie, Nicole and I had grown even closer that summer. The year went on and Matt and I were off and on again depending on the month… but whenever we weren’t together I was always sad. I always wanted to be with him. I started wondering if what I felt for him was healthy at such a young age. It was May of my 8th grade year when Matt had his b-day party at his house. Him and I were on again and I was so excited. Rumor had it there was going to be a lot of dancing and darkness. It was going to be perfect.

Stay tuned for Part 2!

Need to blog?!

I feel like I should be blogging more... like every day or at least every other day. But then I wonder what I should blog about and if anyone cares what I would have to say and then I think who cares if anyone else cares this is my personal blog... my personal feelings and happenings for me to remember. My mind can be a vicious circle.

So really nothing has been going on.... just life!

I got spit on by a girl on the school bus then she hit me.... that was fun! She is a handicapped preschool girl so really there isn't much I can do but just take it and try to tell her it is not nice... considering she is deaf this is tough to do.

Josh took me out to dinner at The Mona Lisa, my absolute favorite place to eat, and I had the most amazing wine there (and I don't drink wine) but I will be a wine drinker from here on out if only I could find this particular bottle of wine (I want it real bad :)

Rylan went skiing for the first time and has proved to be a natural just like his brother, I think I might need to find a second job to pay for my boys "hobbies". I am so thankful for the boys Uncle who takes the time to take them skiing and teach them how to ski, they are very fortunate to have him in there life and they sure do look up to him.




I love this pic of Josh and the boys!!

New Years Eve 2009

We had planned on taking the boys to dinner and then to Alvin and the Chipmunks on New Years Eve this year but while the boys and I were driving to town last week we heard on the radio that you could win tickets to The Bull Bash. Jace was all over that... he really wanted me to call in and try and win the tickets. I told him I would try but it was a long shot. What do you know... I was caller 9!! So plans changed and we ended up going to The Bull Bash. Really though it was perfect... the boys had so much fun!!!

Christmas 2009

What a wonderful Christmas and 2 weeks Christmas break we had. I LOVE LOVE LOVE that I am not really working outside the home (I say that because although I do have a job whenever I am working the boys are with me and I always have the exact same schedule as they do for school... how perfect is that!). I was able to enjoy these 2 weeks with them and we really didn't do a whole lot. We did go see A Christmas Carol one day which scared the dickens out of Rylan and we had to leave 20 minutes into it. But that was about it... otherwise we just hung out at home or at familys houses.

Santa was very good to the boys this year. Jace got an IPOD and Rylan got a painting easel. I got my food processor I have been wanting so bad and Josh got his waders for hunting he has been wanting. We all had a wonderful Christmas!!